[Narvin was going to try to calmly explain that the Doctor has suffered memory loss and his companion has long since gone her own way...but then the less virtuous parts of his personality rise up.]

Doctor! There you are, finally.

...Omega? You've become short! Did the black hole do that?

[Wait for it!

Waaaaait.]

I'm short too! [Looks at his sleeves.] Perhaps it's going around...

[He wants to say in a deadpan voice, "Yes, all the Time Lords are shrinking. It's a genetic crisis." But in the state the Doctor was in now, he might believe it, so he refrains.]

...

I'm not Omega.

Who are you? [Is this Braxiatel? Did he get short and weird looking? How awful a thing to be short and weird looking- OH GOD HIS REFLECTION IN HIS SCREEN! Enjoy him balking at himself a little, Narvin.]

Who do you think I am? [Hey, at least he's not as short and weird looking as *some* Time Lords.]

...Braxiatel?

[That was not the answer he was expecting...but he'll go with it. He puts on his best Smug and Mysterious face.]

It's good to see you've not lost all your wits, Thete.

[Agree without ever actually confirming or denying. That was the Braxiatel way.]

Who's Thete again?

[Narvin would facepalm, except openly showing frustration would be a very un-Brax-like thing to do.]

Don't concern yourself over it, Doctor, there are more important things afoot. Where are you?

I'm in a room.

I'm not sure where.

There's a clown on the couch, though. I've the discomforting notion that it's watching me.

I know where you are. [That evil clown of evilness is memorable.]

Wait for me there.

You know where the clown lives? [This venture, perhaps, may barely be worth it.]

Yes. You're the clown's roommate.

[Narvin's is beginning to wonder if this hastily put together plan was a good idea.]

[Brax is going to make one simple, polite, and pleasant request.]

Do try not to allow him to come to any harm.

[What is suggested by this affable imperative from your Friendly Neighbourhood Presidential Assassin Professor is completely up to Narvin to decide.]

I have no intention of letting the Doctor be hurt while he's in this vulnerable and impressionable state. What sort of Time Lord do you think I am?

...

Somebody please punch me before I regenerate, so I decide not to wear that.

It's not my fault! I just died. The last one had it on!

Well I can't stand that regeneration already. How tactless of him, dying in something that brightly colored and obnoxious.

And too big! [He flappy sleeves at the Doctor.]

Yes, it's obviously too big. Here, do you want to have a look around my TARDIS? Maybe we can find something that fits you better. Perhaps you can wear a nice scarf. Smaller than mine, of course, I think that around ten feet would work wonderfully for you.

This is an excellent idea! [And the camera moves as he goes to the TARDIS.

His own TARDIS.

And goes into it.

And looks around the console room.]

You're not in here!

Of course not, I'm in my own TARDIS.

...how can we both be talking to each other at the same time? That's got to break at least ten rules of time. And I don't think the Time Lords are around to justify this one.

I know, and I don't remember meeting me when I was you, so it might be possible that I'm not you and I'm just me or I'm you but not a you that will be me.

What were we talking about again?

No, you're me. I can sense it. Maybe it's just a time thing? I don't think our third self remembered our second self when they met up.

I can remember my second self as my third but not my third self as my second, and I can remember my third, second, and first self as my fifth much not my fifth self as my first. I think I might be able to remember me as my third. I don't remember me as you but I remember me as my fifth.

....I think I'm starting to remember!

How can you not remember you as me? We're the same, you should be able to remember me. Granted, not me meeting myself, because I haven't done that yet and I'd hate to meet myself, but you should still remember me.

[Have little Rassilon staring at you, Doctor.] ...What happened to your clothes? [That's obviously far more important then searching for Mel.]

I had a horrible accident in which I had to thwart Cybermen at a quilting bee. [He still likes making things up.]

...Do I know you?

What does that mean?

No, I don't think you do... Well, maybe you are going to know me? Or me know you? Anyway, I'm Rassilon!

[Oh he's thinking he's dead and in the Matrix. He must be.] I've heard of you as an adult, but not a wee babby. What are you doing here?

Peylix said it's some sort of mistake. Or accident. But what have you heard of me? [Good things, yes?]

You either helped build the foundations of Gallifreyan civilization or you were a very popular fashion designer on Earth. I can't remember right now. I just died, you know.

[His eyes light up.] Really? But how would I... Am I going to stop them? The bad things they're doing right now? That's... That's... [Overwhelming.]

Of course! Bargain retailers will be imitating your line of handbags for decades to come.





[Wait.]

Oh, yes! You'll lead a revolution too. Or am I supposed to tell you that. If I'm not, forget I mentioned it.

Handbags? What would I want with those...

A revolution? Really? That's great! With Peylix?

I think perhaps with Omega. I've no clue who Peylix is.

[Oh poor Doctor and his lost mind. If you see it lying around, please return it to him.]

Handbags are quite helpful when endowed by dimensional transcendence. And can set off a good pair of shoes.

I don't know who Omega is. Why would anyone call himself Omega? And Peylix is here and older and says a lot of things have happened, so he had to be around!

...What?

Doctor, Mel is safe. It will all be alright, you're a guest here right now. It's only temporary.

I'm feeling a bit better, but ah... there's an unconcious Time Lord in here. He led me to believe he's Braxiatel, but when I pulled off his shoes he wasn't Braxiatel at all.

...An unconscious Time Lord? What does he look like?

[He turns the camera to show Narvin on the floor, face down, and out like a light... In a normal suit with his shoes off.] He's still alive. I thought Braxiatel might be the Master pretending to Braxiatel and he might have regenerated into a somewhat unfortunate form but now I think Braxiatel must have been Braxiatel and this was actually not. [He pokes him with his foot. Nudge.]

Bloody hell, I told him to take it easy. I'm a doctor, I'll be there shortly.

Thank you! Was there something wrong with him?

You mean other than being a stubborn git who doesn't listen?

He's a Time Lord. I thought that was a given. [The Doctor knows his race! He won't deny it.]

Well yes, but he's stubborn even for a Time Lord.