06 April 2012 @ 05:00 pm
[Audio]  
[Public | Audio]

I've noticed that with all the bickering among us, we've often made pronouncements about the differences between who we are and everyone else aboard the ship. The capacity for mystical powers, psychic ability, physical excellence, or technical skill. Some of this is given by our genetics, through training and dedication, through love and support, through anguish and mad accident.

And yet despite these declarations. Someone standing a universe away can be remarkably like you in thought and presence, and someone who grew up in your own home can be as strikingly separate as an alien creature stepping out of its pod to introduce itself for the first time. It's a mystery of the tallest order.

As many of you might know, I ran away from my own home when I was far younger. I stole a TARDIS and left. I was caught, did my time, paid my dues, had her taken and returned. Since then I have lived moving about for what feels like more of my life than I've spent settled in one location. This is the longest I've spent stationary in a long time, and even then I'm still moving. I've often wondered if those people, the ones that grew up in our houses, share our genetics, the ones we occasionally see a glimmer of our shared selves in their faces are as much a part of us as those people a universe away that we know immediately with a few shared words and a look of utter understanding.

I've quite a bit to think about.

[Private to Jesse | Audio]

Pick out a movie of your choice and I'll bring refreshments. We can talk or we can not. I'd simply like the company.

[Absent Spam for Arkady]

[Before going to meet Jesse, he stops in front of her room and leaves a bouquet of Schlenk blossoms as discretely as possible, checking the hall in either direction to ensure that he won't be caught.]
 
 
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Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] bang bang bored[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 12:39 am (UTC)
[Private, Audio]
[There is something Jesse wants to talk about, badly... But after the last few talks with the guy, he's not all that sure how to bring it up. God forbid he tries to talk about Jake and it winds up being about his dreams, or some shit. So to the offer, he just says,]

Whatever, I guess. You're coming here?
championoftime: 7 - 7[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 12:44 am (UTC)
[Private, Audio]
Yes. I'll throw something together. [The Doctor guesses that he needs to talk about it, but his own older brother is leaving. So that's very much on his mind at the moment.]
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] sat down[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 12:59 am (UTC)
[Spam?]
[He signs off without bothering to respond, figuring to clean up a little bit first -- or at least shove some things into a corner and maybe empty an ashtray. Unemployment hasn't been good to the state of his room. By the time the Doctor arrives, there's a small mass of accumulated junk behind one of the big speakers, and Jesse's back to playing video games, a DVD sitting out next to the TV.]
championoftime: 7 -  mooooope[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 01:13 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He shows up with a small cooler of sodas (various varieties of the flavoured sort rather than just coke, though there's a couple of those) some fresh chips (the British kind, which are thick cut fries), and some sandwich materials). He brings them in and sits them on the bed, not minding the mess because he's familiar with them himself. But it is messier than he last looked.]

You've been in your room frequently?
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] bang bang bored[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 01:59 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[Izzy, curled up in the corner, looks up with interest at the smell of the food; but Jesse, in the middle of what looks like fighting a Nazi, doesn't.] Yeah, maybe. Where else is there to go?

Hold up-- [He bites his lip, hits a few buttons, and lets out a triumphant sound as maybe-Himmler goes down. Then, he finally pauses and looks over at the Doctor, reaching for a soda.] You cool with that? [He nods to the DVD -- it's Blank Check Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle.] It's funny.
championoftime: 7 - point[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 02:18 am (UTC)
[Spam]
Nazis. Why is it always Nazis. [He sighs. The real things shooting is always unpleasant.]

What's it about? [He looks at the DVD.] I'll certainly give it a try.]
Jesse Pinkman: side-eye[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 02:23 am (UTC)
[Spam]
I'll make sure to put on like Donkey Kong the next time you come over. [He rolls his eyes and switches the TV to video, going over to put the movie in.] It's a... you know, a stoner flick. Guys get high and try to get to White Castle. It's funny.
championoftime: 7 - ewie[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 03:10 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He shakes his head.] No, not that. I'm reminded that I run into more Nazis than I care to in my travels. No less than four times in just this body.

[He squints, a little dubious. But trusting that Jesse was still clean and that this wouldn't cause a spontaneous relapse, motions for him to continue.]
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] fuckin' side-eye[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 03:34 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He's probably not going to start doing meth again from watching Kal Penn ride a cougar, no. He pops it in and sits down on the bed, peeling a slice of meat off the sandwich fixings to throw it to the eagerly waiting Izzy.]

You've run into Nazis four times? Jesus. Why not just... I don't know, kill Hitler, then?
championoftime: 7 - displeased[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 03:38 am (UTC)
[Spam]
Because I could potentially swallow Earth in a black hole. Very delicate thing, killing Hitler. Met a gentleman on board that pulled it off once, though.

[He picks up one of the bottles of soda and settles back for the start of the movie, pushing his hat back on his head.]
Jesse Pinkman: fret[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 03:57 am (UTC)
[Spam]
Seriously? Time travel, yo... [Sometimes, talking to the Doctor, he gets the impression that it's not as cool or helpful as he'd like it to be. Talking to Narvin, of course, he gets the impression that it's actually super fucking boring, but he just figures that's Narvin's fault.]

[He settles down to watch, picking at the fries... and it's funny and all, but maybe it's just that he's never watched this while he wasn't high himself, or maybe it's just that he's distracted as hell, because he keeps finding himself sneaking glances at his warden instead of the movie. Did the guy really come over just to watch something?

After a while, he clears his throat, affecting casualness.]
So, you... you talked to my brother, right?
championoftime: 7 -  in the dark[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 04:58 am (UTC)
Re: [Spam]
[A couple of minutes into the movie, he covers his mouth lightly with his fingers. Because he realizes that Kumar is Hex. Just not Scottish. Then the horrible idea of a high Hex hits him-

But that's thankfully shaken out of his head when Jesse says something.]

Aye, I did. [He waits for Jesse to continue.]
Jesse Pinkman: are you there god it's me jesse[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 05:00 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[Not knowing what the horror's all about, he's sort of hoping it's not, well... him.]

Nothing I should... know about? What he said, what you said?
championoftime: 7 -  tietug[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 05:05 am (UTC)
[Spam]
That he never got to know you. I thought that was remarkably sad. [Though something he could slightly identify with.] That you'd had trouble with rehabilitation programs in the past.
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] down[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 05:19 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He turns back to the movie to give himself a second to process that. The first makes him pretty sad, too; the second is a surprise.]

I... didn't know he knew about the rehab. I didn't think they'd tell him... [He lets out a puff of air and shakes his head.] They didn't tell him, but I guess he figured it out. He's a smart kid, right? Real smart.

[He picks at a thread on the sheets.] He makes up for me, I guess.
championoftime: 7 - mulling[personal profile] championoftime on April 7th, 2012 05:29 am (UTC)
[Spam]
He did seem very intuitive. Bright young lad. But no, he doesn't make up for you.

[He rubs under his nose and squints at the escape in the university. They seem to be passable at evading the authorities.]

He deserves to know who you really are rather than what anyone else tells him. Though I wouldn't ask you to go back there. Not with attitude that seems to prevail.
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] o rly[personal profile] yeahscience on April 7th, 2012 09:29 am (UTC)
[Spam]
The attitude that I'm a life-ruining asshole? Yeah, I'm none too eager to get more of that.

[He laughs, despite himself, at a joke -- what? the Indian dude is funny -- and picks at another fry.] I might stop by, though, when I'm done. I mean, I was going to anyway, to check on Andrea and her kid... figured I'd give home a pass, but... You think he'd want me to? I mean... did it seem that way?
championoftime: 7 - fidgety[personal profile] championoftime on April 8th, 2012 04:00 am (UTC)
Re: [Spam]
I very much believe you should. He deserves to get to know you as you, not what what your parents have led him to believe. Quite a few people spoke up on your behalf. [He's not as sinister a creeper as Narvin. But he is a creeper.]
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] hurt[personal profile] yeahscience on April 8th, 2012 04:10 am (UTC)
[Spam]
Yeah. Yeah, I saw that. [And he's still not really sure what to think about it. The more friends he makes in this place, the less he knows what to think.]

[He goes quiet again, watching, halfheartedly eating... But when Kumar's father shows up, he mutters:] He's mad I wasn't around. He wrote this letter, and... [He grins humorlessly, scratching his jaw.] He called me an asshole, actually.
championoftime: 7 - que?[personal profile] championoftime on April 8th, 2012 04:15 am (UTC)
[Spam]
For having been absent?
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] down[personal profile] yeahscience on April 8th, 2012 12:09 pm (UTC)
[Spam]
[He nods.] Yeah. And he's right, too. I mean, by the end, maybe I was trying to look out for him a little, keep my shit out of his life, but...

[He gets up suddenly and goes to fetch his cigarettes and an ashtray from the nightstand.] You mind?
championoftime: 7 - concentrating[personal profile] championoftime on April 8th, 2012 08:12 pm (UTC)
[Spam]
No. [He does a little, but he figures Jesse should be relaxed more than he minds.]

My own brother's leaving. He just graduated. I wish he'd been around more when I was younger- I keep thinking if he had, I might have been able to help prevent him from becoming an inmate.

I feel a bit sorry for your brother.
Jesse Pinkman: [4-5] smoking #2[personal profile] yeahscience on April 9th, 2012 04:52 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He lights up gratefully, because yeah, he's feeling tense. Not angry, not even edgy, just... it's hard to deal with this, a failure he's barely ever even thought about until now.]

Didn't know you had a brother. [He sits back down next to the Doctor, bringing the ashtray with him.] That, uh, that guy... I saw the announcement. I don't know him, though.

[He heard what else you said, Doctor, and he's not sure what to say to it, but after a second, he nods. He feels sorry for the kid, too.]
championoftime: 7 - enjoying his coffee[personal profile] championoftime on April 9th, 2012 05:07 am (UTC)
Re: [Spam]
[He's been bothered by the thing with his own brother since his younger self confirmed that what was wrong must have been his fault. But what if it wasn't? ..No, it would always feel like it was, simply because he spent so much time running.]

My brother, he did something horrible while he was here. [He would leave the information a little obscure. No need to talk about the torture while watching... was that Dr. Horrible?! That looked like Dr. Horrible.] You've done nothing to that level, however-

Rather than accepting that you're a terrible person capable of terrible things, remember there's a young man that may wonder one day if it's his fault for not having spoken with you enough. Even if you don't return home, he should know that he's at least some sort of positive influence. I say that more as a younger brother than a warden.

[He points to Neal Patrick Harris thoughtfully, and with a squint. He looks too much like him. Only he seems very interested in those ladies.]
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] listening[personal profile] yeahscience on April 10th, 2012 02:54 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[It's Doogie, Doctor. Duh. But Jesse's preoccupied with this conversation, so he just glances at the screen, then turns away, towards his warden.]

Yeah, but it's got nothing to do with him, pretty much. I mean, I was thirteen when he was born, like-- I was already the resident family screwup way before that.
championoftime: 7 -  tietug[personal profile] championoftime on April 10th, 2012 03:19 am (UTC)
[Spam]
My own brother was an adult politician when I was born. [He motions to Jesse.] May I see the letter?
Jesse Pinkman: [1-3] locked in[personal profile] yeahscience on April 10th, 2012 04:26 am (UTC)
[Spam] 1/2, split for clarity
So you know you didn't screw him up, then, right? He went bad, he did it on his own, same as me.

[He digs into his pocket, though, and pulls out the crumpled letter, handing it over.] Go ahead. It's real, you know, eloquent. [He draws a knee up onto the bed and rests his chin atop it, flashing a faint, wry smile.] Kid writes way better than I ever could.
Jesse Pinkman: [flood] srs jake is srs[personal profile] yeahscience on April 10th, 2012 04:48 am (UTC)
[Spam] 2/2
[The letter is handwritten, and reads:]

Dear Jesse,

I've been asked to write you a letter. When I said that I didn't know what to say to you, they told me to speak from the heart. This is all I can think to say:

You're an asshole.

Maybe you'll say, "How can you say that? You don't even know me." That's the problem. I don't remember anything from before you left except a lot of fighting, you disappearing for days at a time, and Mom crying a lot. Now, you stop by every few months, and you say we should hang out, and then you mess something up and you leave again.

You never stay to see what happens next. What happens is that all of your failures become my potential failures. Nothing I do is enough to fix what you do.

I said you were the favorite. How do I know? Because I have to work all the time, and all you would have to do is show up and not screw up. You don't even do that. I know that was my fault the last time, but you never even tried. They still worry about you all the time. They worry about you so much that they only worry about me because they worry about you.

So thanks for ruining my life, you asshole. I wish my trophies had fallen on you.

Also, they asked me to write this so you'd have something of me, but this is more than I've ever had from you, so I hope you really enjoy it.

Jake

PS: I went looking for your stash and I didn't find it, so I guess that means you really did quit, at least. I'm trying to think of a way to tell Mom and Dad that much, so maybe they'll relax and stop looking for mine.
championoftime: 7 - determination[personal profile] championoftime on April 10th, 2012 04:59 am (UTC)
[Spam]
It's more of a matter that he did it on his own- without me there to stop him or influence him. [He looks a little sadly at the letter.

The movie is lost on him briefly. It's either helpful or damning, considering.] You should try, I think. He deserves for you to try. Your decisions make it extremely difficult for him. He can be the best he can be, and it won't unmake your bad decisions as they're still yours and not his. Only you can make amends for those- at least prove someone can become better.

Edited 2012-04-10 05:32 am (UTC)
Jesse Pinkman: [4-5] skeptic[personal profile] yeahscience on April 10th, 2012 06:34 am (UTC)
[Spam]
You don't think it'd be better for me to, I don't know. Stay the hell out of his life? I mean-- [He points with his cigarette.] Yo, he makes it pretty fucking clear he don't want nothing to do with me.

[But it seems like he's looking for a certain answer anyway, his eyes on the Doctor, shaded with caution.]
championoftime: 7 - intense glare[personal profile] championoftime on April 10th, 2012 07:10 am (UTC)
Re: [Spam]
He's angry right now.

But your parents, your parents, as in the parents that you both share and mutually contributed to your upbringing need to be proven wrong for his sake. So they'll treat him better.

Stop letting him down and making promises you can't deliver. Start delivering regardless of whether you've promised or not.

[He gives Jesse a very unwavering and intent look. This from someone who ran away, but by god still buys his brother socks to remind him he's there.]
Jesse Pinkman: judging u[personal profile] yeahscience on April 10th, 2012 09:07 am (UTC)
[Spam]
[He meets the Doctor's gaze evenly, drawing slowly on his smoke. There's something intent in his expression, but it's not exactly challenging -- or if it is, it's not challenging the warden, at least. He draws in slowly and exhales, then drops his eyes and nods.]

So I'll stop by, maybe, if I ever make it out of here. Kid's gotta get something for putting up with our folks all this time, right?
can_has_vodka: ohai[personal profile] can_has_vodka on April 7th, 2012 05:14 am (UTC)
[Arkady waits until he's almost out of sight before popping her head out.] Eeeeeee!

[She scoops them up and hurries back in to put them in the brim of her straw hat, and then goes running out to show her new...er...creation off.]
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тнє σηє ωнσ ιѕ αℓℓ: mask ✵ interrogate[personal profile] bodyreads on April 8th, 2012 02:50 am (UTC)
A TARDIS?
championoftime: 7 - 6garb perplexed[personal profile] championoftime on April 8th, 2012 03:57 am (UTC)
The acronym for my ship. Time and Relative Dimensions in Space. Also called a "time capsule".