(no subject)

[championoftime]

[Public | Audio]

[The Doctor faces the camera of his journal towards himself with a determined, serious expression. He holds up one finger.]

I've got quite a bit on my mind, and I'd prefer not to lose my temper... however-

[He turns it away, to show his TARDIS painted pink.]

I know the old girl wouldn't choose to do this to herself! Who's responsible?! Someone must be, because usually I can simply move into the vortex with her and when she returns her appearance is restored from whatever graffiti and defacement has occurred. This has been positively impossible to remove.

Comments

[timesbureaucrat]

Oh please. The Type 40 isn't a classic, it's geriatric. They were pulled from service before I was even loomed.

[championoftime]

And she handles a single pilot beautifully. [...No one here has driven enough with him to argue! Fantastic.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[And now the Time Lord metaphorical penis-measuring contest has started.]

You've just forgotten what piloting a functional ship feels like. I'm sure your antique can't compare to my Type 98 battle TARDIS.

[Actually, Narvin found it tremendously difficult to pilot her on his own. Fortunately, Kay was picking it up quickly.]

[championoftime]

Oh a battle TARDIS? I'd like to see how you handled the Psycho-Telemetric Circuits with manual input in one of those.

[I bet you can't even drive stick anymore. Insert scoffing here.]

[timesbureaucrat]

I can handle it just fine, thank you very much. Even if manual input is obsolete technology.

[I can too drive a stick, really!]

And the Type 98 has features that the Type 40 never had. Like a remote TARDIS security system and a dematerialization pause function.

[championoftime]

...Why would you want to pause while you're dematerializing?

[Why would you want your car to bounce like that?]

[timesbureaucrat]

[Because it's the hot shit that all pimped out TARDISes have.]

There's any number of situations where it could be useful.

[Not that Narvin's encountered one yet, but he's sure they must exist.]

comment not here lalalala

[peter_vincent]

[Peter finds this whole conversation crazy and intriguing. He's bored enough to lurk.]

comment also not here lalalala

[rass_bestie]

[Same, though only because it's amusing.]

[championoftime]

Half invisible in the middle of a fight perhaps? So they know just where your hostile TARDIS is entering the vortex.

The old girl might have a broken Chameleon Circuit but she's far outwieghed that with her adaptability.

[So what if my car has that weird 60's pink Cadillac paint job, all her parts work and the woven seat cushions are comfy!]

[timesbureaucrat]

It would be useful for luring enemies into a trap. Especially if they couldn't keep up otherwise. [You never know when luring inconveniently slow enemies into a trap might be the perfect strategy. And when it is, Narvin and his Type 98 with its dematerialization pause function will be all over that.]

By "adaptability" I take it that you're referring to the fact that she miraculously hasn't fallen apart yet. I'm sure it's only a matter of time.

[Your car looks like an escapee from a wrecking yard. Seriously, how do you keep it running?]

[championoftime]

I'd like to see how yours is standing up in a couple of millennia.

[These new models just aren't made for longevity like his baby is.]

[timesbureaucrat]

I'm sure the Type 98 will hold up just fine. Besides, I don't need a time capsule that will outlast my own lifespan.

[Dude, your car is older than you are.]

[championoftime]

Why not? [Boggled, why would someone not want a TARDIS they'd want to be with for that long?]

[timesbureaucrat]

Well, because after I'm dead...

It's not like the CIA could just re-bond her to someone else. [They *could* with a bit of effort and a time capsule memory readjustment, but he doesn't want them to. He (rather selfishly) wants her to last only exactly as long as he lasts.)

[strangehistorian]

[Scolding:] Narvin! That's terribly impolite to say about a lady!

[timesbureaucrat]

I'm simply stating the truth! She's a decrepit old box. [Narvin fails in tactfulness. Again.]

[strangehistorian]

[There's a ripple in time, and suddenly there is an ivory priest-staff aimed at Narvin's head. For bonking.]

[timesbureaucrat]

Ow! [Narvin didn't expect the bonk on the head. It's more surprising than painful.]

I'm...sorry. [He forces the apology out.]

She's a fine looking girl. [He can't stop himself from adding:] For her extreme advanced old age.